02.28.07
Jet lag
I woke up this morning with a cold. I think I’d felt it coming on yesterday but was pleasantly living in denial. As it sometimes happens I get miniature colds when I’m having my period or when my mind/body is out of synch. I realized this morning – I have a double whammy in that regard.
Last night I met with Harley, and I babbled non-stop. While I wondered if it was that I’ve been starved for social conversation for the last five months why I hardly let him get a word in edgewise, I also understood – I’m not completely in Portland yet. My body and heart are here – but my brain is still on the road somewhere with an undetermined ETA. I realized after I rushed out of coffee and ran off to dinner without even inviting Harley, how rude I know, I’m sorry Harley, I realized – I still feel like I’m driving. I’m in a hurry to get to locations do things and I’m not fully absorbing the experience. Though happy and cheerful and having fun – I’m missing the deeper levels around me, which could easily affect my search for jobs and visits with friends.
I’m home… but I got here at light speed and the other half of myself is still on vacation – probably somewhere between Park City and Hood River. After my long complaint about Bob Schneider yesterday I wonder now, if it wasn’t just me, or if perhaps he’s suffering from the same “present moment jet lag”.
Anyway, I need to figure out how to get the rest of my parts all in one spot. When I’m sitting somewhere and I catch movement out the corner of my eye, I still check my rearview mirror, even if I’m at a coffee shop. Last week when I was sitting in the movie theatre there was a time I felt like my body was still moving, vibrating subtly to the asphalt.
So I’ve been here 10 days – how long will it take to feel like I’m really here?
megan said,
February 28, 2007 at 3:06 pm
yeah..I think a lot of people are having that “present moment jetlag” cause I’ve certainly got it….I feel like I’m going in circles. like I get something and then the same problem comes up..like I talk to Zack about us and then I realize I’m not happy..maybe I just need more than he can give..aww…shit, I totally co-opted your post for a bitchiness about my life. sorry. I was trying to say I get it. and then I got carried away. anyhow. loves you. you wanna do something (cheap or free, cause I’m poor till I get some tips!) on Sunday or Monday?
Athena said,
March 1, 2007 at 2:43 pm
Sweety, thanks for hearing me. Something cheap or free this coming week sound great!
Loves you too, darlin!
Harley said,
March 2, 2007 at 4:52 pm
No apologies needed. It was great seeing you again. I’m so happy you’re back in Portland.
Athena said,
March 4, 2007 at 8:22 pm
Thanks Harley
It was really-super-cool and (all sorts of other great descriptive words) to see you again also. Thanks for the night out and I hope we’ll get to catch up more soon!!!