12.10.07

To my Biatch, Larry

Posted in Uncategorized at 12:36 am by Athena

People wonder why I don’t let my spam filter have comments like these.  They send emails and ask why I let them through. Truly, because I like the perspective that other people have, even if for no other reason that I feel entirely validated in my choices after such things are posted. Plus, I mean come on! If I let the filter keep them… how else would I be able to ridicule these sorts of comments to death?

This one is for Larry, who commented on the last post…

Larry - “You obviously think that it’s cute to rattle on about your violent thoughts and threats. Well, it isn’t. Having such violent thoughts doesn’t mean you’re tough; it means you’re disturbed. Threatening people doesn’t make you cool; it makes you ridiculous. You are rude, unprofessional and unstable. You ought to be fired.”

You’re right, Larry, I ought to be fired.   I should be canned but not just for my unconventional line of defense against a person who was by all other descriptions abusing me and my position as a service provider… I should be fired for vulgar language in a place of employment, improper dress code, general disorderliness – well, hell, while we’re at it, let’s add – fired for having thoughts that land squarely out of the box, being an individual, standing up for myself, refusing to be bullied, wearing pink and complaining at the water cooler. You. Are. Right. I should be fired. No argument from me at all.

Larry- “In fact, many of your antics - “social experiments” like interviewing random men on the street, quizzing the patrons of coffee shops about how well you’ve gotten to know them, posting naked videos of yourself, insisting on having only a first name, etc - are sadly, painfully adolescent. Picking fights with drunken strangers in public? Are you that desperate for attention?”

Evidently, Larry, you are right about this one as well! It’s amazing! Such insightful brilliance! If I had known all I had to do to find such a simple answer to the questions that have burned in my bosom all these years was to post a blog – a Personal blog on the interweb so a strange man could write in and ask, “Are you that desperate for attention?” GOD! It’s like a miracle. I thought no one would even understand that all I needed to feel, whole and human and part of a productive member of society was to get… attention.  Think of all the money I could have saved on therapy! The first name thing though, that I will make a compromise on. I let my bitches call me Mistress Athena, and you sound like a bitch. 

Larry –“You’re confusing violence and aggression with strength. You’re unable to discern the vulgar from the erotic. You indulge your narcissism and call it introspection.”

Violence –aggression –violence-vulgar-erotic-violence-vulgar-strength – wait, I’m confused, what do any of these things have to do with me? Narcissism? Me? Go get me a sandwich, Bitch.

Larry –“It’s interesting how you seem to believe that such aggression is excused by your gender. You would probably be outraged if a man made the exact same violent threats.”

I think “outraged” is a strong word for it, I don’t think I’d be outraged, I’d probably just kick his ass. Oh crap, did that sound violent and disturbed?

Larry-“The blog about ASD was particularly ironic. For somebody as socially incompetent as you are to speak of the developmentally handicapped was laughable.”

Strong words coming from a man who has nothing better to do than to read someone’s personal blog and write a long rant about how pathetic they are… either you are very bored or perhaps you are also on the spectrum….

Larry, “Your “writing” is garbage. It’s forced. It’s uninspired. You string together as many extravagant adjectives and adverbs as you can find in your thesaurus and call it art. Even worse, most of your elaborate phrases are used incorrectly or applied inappropriately.”

Ex-trav-a-gant. Dude! Nothing like a little bit of constructive criticism, but that’s okay, I forgive your lack of tact being that you’re on the PDD spectrum as previously mentioned. So here’s the thing, if you’re going to write a nasty-gram about someone’s writing – you might not want to list all the entries you have read. I mean, it’s one thing to come back to a blog once or twice to check in but if my writing is so terrible, as previously claimed and my antics are so juvenile as previously stated… then why have you, by your own admission read all the posts about- “social experiments” like interviewing random men on the street, quizzing the patrons of coffee shops about how well you’ve gotten to know them, posting naked videos of yourself, insisting on having only a first name, etc - are sadly, painfully adolescent. Picking fights with drunken strangers in public? Are you that desperate for attention?” I mean, it smacks of a tiny obsession – so I took the liberty of tracking your IP to find out how long you’ve been reading mostly out of a morbid curiosity to see how bad I must suck for someone to come back again and again and about oh, 129 times, actually… and even 4-5 times for specific posts.  I find that pretty interesting and mighty telling. Mostly telling that perhaps you yourself are a disgruntled writer. Just a thought.

Larry, “Your immaturity is perhaps best illustrated by your selfish, childish talk of art and creation as far more noble and valuable than the drudgery of employment. You speak of genuine work as though it’s beneath you. Does your drivel make the world go ’round? Does it build roads or write laws? Does it grow and harvest crops? Are you so special that you are exempt from making any real contribution?”

Larry, your soapbox was made by an artisan of some degree.  Your coffee mug, t-shirts, the house you live in, the shows you watch, your toothbrush and your chair. Everything you touch, everything you own was created by someone. And evidently, my “drivel” as you put it might not make the world go round – but it brought you back again and again and about oh, 129 times.  Maybe you should go write your own drivel so your basement won’t be so lonely.

Larry -“You disparage the productive individuals who make this society function while you sit on your ass, eat chocolate and snivel about where to put your crayons.”

Now, that’s just rude and untrue. I have never disparaged those people who follow their bliss even when their bliss is a career that is not a choice for me. Now you’re just making shit up and I have no energy for fabrications of the malicious sort. Grow up, Larry.

Larry, “Your blog will continue to be the epitome of pathetic, embarrassing and irresponsible behavior.”

And evidently, you will keep coming back to read it, again and again and… oh yeah, we’ve had this conversation before. 129 times.

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